Tell: My Aunty
Show:
My aunty has got long brown straight hair with a fringe she has brown eyes and is short. My aunty is a Maaori. She is nice and wears pretty clothes.She has a child called Ashley
Show:
My aunty has got long brown straight hair with a fringe she has brown eyes and is short. My aunty is a Maaori. She is nice and wears pretty clothes.She has a child called Ashley
I like the detail you have in your writing about your Aunty. The bit where you have said her hair is 'long brown straight hair with a fringe' gives me a good idea of what her hair looks like. You said she is short...it would help me to get a picture in my head if you said 'she is as short as......(maybe the fridge - ow whatever" so I could picture her height. Great work with show not tell writing.
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